Thursday, April 3, 2014

After Midnight

Here I sit, long after midnight. Once again, I am reminded of the reason I named this blog "Letters After Midnight." My mom once told me that when I was an infant I was colicky and would be up screaming at all hours of the night. She, being the good Army pilot's wife that she was, had night duty with me. She would sit at the kitchen table with me draped across her lap (attempting to provide some tummy relief to a colicky infant - and some mental/physical relief for a tired, worn out mommy) and write letters. Apparently she used to say she would someday compile a book of those letters entitled, "Letters After Midnight." Thus the name of this blog, begun when I found myself a new mama with a colicky newborn.

Now I sit here after my last every-four-hour breast pumping session, once again writing after midnight. We are eagerly anticipating the arrival of the baby boy we are adopting. The due date is a little over three weeks away, and the scheduled induction is about two weeks away. I have pulled out all of our boy (and gender-neutral) baby clothes and washed those for newborn-3 months. The infant car seat has been brought in from the garage, dusted off, and the cover washed. Burp cloths, towels, and bassinet bedding (ha - we'll see if we get much use out of that this time either) have been washed and folded. We started packing our bags today - gearing up for a road trip that begins as a family of five and, God willing, ends as a new family of six.

I am beyond excited, but also nervous. Joyful, yet a little teary (which could be related to my ongoing attempt to relactate). I can't wait to welcome this little guy into the world and into our family. I am also looking forward to adding his biological family to our "perfectly imperfect" extended family. Recently a friend pointed out an insightful blog post exploring the parallels between marriage and open adoption. Melissa over at Open Adoption Open Heart wrote a beautiful piece which you can find here.

The parallel drawn was a new one to me, but the sentiment is somethingn that we have come to believe in over the last couple of years. When we welcome this sweet child into our lives, our family, and our home we are not only growing our family by one tiny baby, but adding his biological family to our extended family. Adopting a child is not a transaction - it is a uniting of two groups (our family and the child's biological family) with a common purpose (to give a child the best life we can collectively manage). I love how Melissa relates open adoption to marriage. Just as a marriage joins two separate (and sometimes very different) families, adoption joins two separate (and sometimes very different) families.

I want to be able to tell my son, years from now, that his biological family loved him enough to believe our family would be a good place for him to grow up and that we did everything in our power to make his biological family part of our "perfectly imperfect" extended family. I can't wait...


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